I believe you know what it is I'm asking for.

Please Lord,
grant me this one wish.

Please don't let her suffer too much longer.

If you must take her from us
to be with you in that magnificent kingdom of Heaven,
help me to find a way to be more happy for her
and less sad for myself.

Please Lord,help me find the courage to deal with this, because Lord, I'm afraid.

I'm afraid that I'll be too sad to remember the happy times, and I'll only remember the sad ones.

Please help me to fend off the terrible feeling of guilt that I'm feeling inside for not being a better child.

Please help me to stop this agonizing feeling that I feel because I "would have" enjoyed things more "IF I'D ONLY KNOWN!!"
Please Lord, why couldn't I have spent more quality time?
Maybe visited more?
Spent a few more quiet moments
Given a few more hugs and kisses?
Said I love you ?

Why now Lord?
Why do happy memories feel like they're haunting me?

Happy memories are making me sad.

Will they ever be HAPPY memories again?
Or just painful reminders of
what I can't have anymore?

Am I selfish for wanting to hold on to the past?
For wanting to savor it
relive it
like an addict
looking for another high?

Would it be as good this time round?
Would it be
as happy?

I don't know Lord
But I'd love to give it just one try.

I promise you Lord, if you grant me this one wish
I'll live, laugh and love more
just because I can, and not just because I'm
supposed to.

But if you can't accomodate this wish ,
then Please, Please, Please
Oh Lord,

Take care of MY DEAR Father
when you take
MY SWEET Mother home.